Limitations
I got a lesson in limitations this week. First some background. Some of you may know I was born with clubbed feet. This is a condition which causes feet to turn in. I had corrective surgery on both feet as an infant, and then on the right foot when I was 16. My feet have always been a source of pain for me. It was one reason I did not take gym as a kid.
As a result of surgeries, I am left with limited range of motion, due to tendons and bones removed. My fear when I started running was I would not be able to run, because of the issues with my feet. As I ran more, I gained more confidence about my feet.
Last week was a lesson for me in how I have improved, but how much I have to go. My friend Krys took me to South Bend to view the marathon course. It was fairly hilly. Growing up in South Bend, I don't remember hills, but the course runs along the St. Joe River, and it is a hiilly area. I wondered how my feet would handle the hills. To be honest I was scared at that point.
My next lesson came the next day. My long run was 18 miles. I had not been able to get past 16 miles in any of my runs, so to reach this point was big. It also means I have concerns about finishing the marathon. I was incredible pain the last 3 miles. My feet reminded me they are still there and not happy. Two days later I am still hobbling around.
I am trying to decide if I should run the half-marathon. I know I can finish it, hills and all.
This is a mental break week for me. Tuesday I am going to a monastery to do some thinking and to get totally away. I'm also spending time with family in Wisconsin. I think the break will do me a world of good.
So I leave you with this question....do I go for the marathon and risk not finishing, or do I run the half-marathon, where I know I can finish?
:-)Charlie
posted by Javarunner1962 @ 7:17 AM
1 Comments:
Charlie,
It depends on why you're running the marathon and what it means to you emotionally to finish the race.
Is it about runningthe race or about finishing the race?
Which one of those images "catches" at the deep places in your soul?
If you need to finish the race, if that's really important for you, go for the half-marathon. That's an impressive distance and says a lot about how far you've come in the last two years.
If you want the experience of taking yourself as far as you can go whether you run or walk across the finish line (or get dropped to the ground by a pair of rebelling feet shy of the finish line), then go for the full marathon.
I worry that this has been a really tough 12 months for you and if the running is about finishing the race and you don't, will you be devastated? Will that drop your feelings about yourself down through the cellar?
Will you be able to see the accomplishment or will you have a neon sign in your head flashing "failure"? You won't bea failure, God knows, because a half-marathon is (let me say it again) an impressive distance.
And, remember, this isn't the last marathon that will ever be held ever in the world (or even in South Bend). You can do a 1/2 marathon this year and do a full marathon another year if you feel like it.
You've set a very very high goal in the marathon, especially for someone with your feet, your weight history, and your relatively short running history.
I think you're right that it's going to be very very tough to run the entire marathon. There's a good chance you'll have to walk a good chunk of it. Is that going to be OK for you? Will it still feel like success?
I do NOT want you setting yourself up to only see this through the lens of what you didn't do.
But if you can feel proud, elated, and successful if you have to walk across that line, then go for the whole thing.
Do the thing that will serve your heart and soul the best.
I love you and I want you to be proud of everything you accomplish.
Post a Comment
<< Home